Since I was a young girl sleep has always been a journey to the unknown. Caught between realties of this world and the next, I often wondered in which one was I sleeping and which one was I awake. Stories of dreams intertwined with my waking life with abstractions that floated in my subconscious carving deeper into a much more limitless potential of reality. This made it sometimes hard to relate in the everyday experience with family and peers, but the most challenging experience that I faced since I was young until really the end of 2010, was my connection to the spirit world.
This culture is quite obsessed with the “knowing” leaving the fragments of the “unknown” to be feared of. We can’t make out what or who that being in the dark may be, and so, a creative mind naturally fabricates a reality, anything to latch the unknown with something it can relate to. “When will the mystery end?” we ask ourself, as our mind pounds with all the assumptions that are probably not true. This is an insanity that many of us live with on myriad levels. From gossiping and misunderstandings to the thin veil of dreamality, the obsession with needing to have an answer even if we have to make it up, drives many of us into our own hell. How many of us remember the Boogie man, Bloody Mary or the monster in the closet? Hasn’t this all been because we haven’t been taught since our youth to be comfortable with the unknown as just part of life? To be comfortable with the unknown is a simple way of saying how I was able to deal with my nightmares, night terrors frequent paralyzing ghost visits and all that bizarre stuff, but why was this happening and on what levels was I most susceptible to being in frequency with this kind of reality.
My night paralysis started to take on its heaviest effects on me right after I gave birth to my son. I was obviously low energy, had a completely natural birth that lasted 33 painfully beautiful, but painful hours and I was living in a not so fabulous neighborhood where the first four months since living there two homicides and burglaries happened only within a two block radius from my house. And did I mention undertones of constant paranoia I and others had to face with by us living here, but there was cute hardwood floor, cute oldschool craftman moldings and a really sweet bathrooms that I just couldn’t pass up, (deep breath… I know)
As I started practicing Feng Shui there are two types of calculations using compass readings and numerology that determine the auspicious/ inauspicious areas of a given space and how you are affected by them. One called the Lo Shu portents defines the relative qualities of the interior space and the other called the Ming Gua determines how compatible a space is to its owner. There are areas that are good for relationships, prosperity, clear thinking and healing and others that are better to spend the least amount of time in. I discovered I was sleeping in the area that should be most avoided. According to my Ming Gua I found out that my house and I did not match. In our Ming Guas We have 4 cardinal directions and 4 intercardinal directions and each one of those directions holds an energetic personality that affects humans in different ways. 4 of those directions are said to bring more Auspicious outcomes and the other 4 are considered to bring about less auspicious outcomes. Ideally we want to match our Auspicious directions with our houses. In my case, my Aileen Street house and I, so did not. So then now, what’s a girl to do?
Before making any adjustments based on compass calculations we must first look at the form. Form school is another branch of Feng Shui that examines our physical surroundings on a symbolic level based on yin yang and 5 element theories. First of all I was living in an environment that did not support me in a positive way, due to the fact that I was constantly paranoid and scared of my neighbors, that is a clear signal why my sleep may have been that way. This is also called Predecessor Qi – an energy in a space that has been there before you, such as living on a burial ground or in a space where someone had died or fought a lot. This all affects the space and needs a proper Space Clearing before one inhabits a space. I was living in an area with some Heavy ass energy too thick for me to clear. Second of all, I was sleeping underneath a window…. During the fall/winter months! That is a big Feng SHui no no. So obviously I moved my bed from under the windows and that helped a lot. When I was sleeping under the window, I heard voices in my sleep that weren’t there when I awoke and was frequently violently paralyzed at night to the point of not being able to breathe as I was visited by ghosts and lost souls asking for help. I realized the only way I was able to sleep was if I did a space clearing everynight before went to bed. I got the sage out, cracked the windows, lit a candle and said my prayers, cutting off cords and old agreements that I unconsciously made through the power of fear and the unknown. I also saw a Filipino Shaman who gave me this long piece of bark that was from a tree in the Philippines where he performed his rights of passage as a shaman. I used it every night as my sword, I even cut off a head of a ghosts with that tool. But seriously though I felt like it was becoming too much for me.
And now the compass reading comes in to the rescue. I found out I was sleeping in the seven ghosts sector so I switched rooms, but the room I switched too was on the corner of the street, not so ideal, but my sleep improved about 80%.
Feng Shui has helped me through my intense night paralysis and I still use it in my daily life to help me figure out good directions for studying and a good place to have relationship conversations.
I just wanted to share with you all some of my experiences, knowing that some have experienced similar stuff as this and more..And so I learned whats most import is giving respect to the energy that has lived there before and knowing when its time to stay away also takes learning through experience.
Wednesday, February 2, 2011
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